4 June 2010
I just found out how much my husband paid for my ring and I’m kind of disappointed — what to do?
Posted by admin under: Marriage & Divorce .
Okay, last night, my husband revealed to me how much he paid for my ring — $5000. That’s not very much for him. He buys cars all the time that cost 10 times that much. He could’ve bought something nicer for me. And I didn’t get to pick out the ring, so it’s not really my taste. It’s also not a traditional bridal set (with an engagement ring and a wedding band) — it’s just one ring. I know this all sounds very superficial, but it sort of bothers me. When he proposed, I told him that I liked the ring because I didn’t want to hurt his feelings or seem materialistic. When he told me how much he paid for it, I told him that I wanted an upgrade after we have our first baby. He kind of laughed, but I really do want the upgrade. I wear it every day, you know. It should be something I like. And he got to pick out his ring, so I think I got a raw deal. He’s kind of a cheapskate — he actually thinks he spent a lot of money on it, believe it or not.
Oh and sorry about the re-post. My question got deleted when I asked this earlier for some reason!!! Arrgh, **** that!
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24 Comments so far...
pj Says:
5 June 2010 at 6:42 pm.
IMHO you sound ungrateful and spoiled.
Ms. GTO Says:
7 June 2010 at 4:20 pm.
“When he proposed, I told him that I liked the ring because I didn’t want to hurt his feelings or seem materialistic.”
So lying and then bitching about it later is SO much better?
“It should be something I like. And he got to pick out his ring, so I think I got a raw deal. He’s kind of a cheapskate — he actually thinks he spent a lot of money on it, believe it or not.”
You are materialistic, and shallow, to boot.
I got a plain silver band as an engagement ring and I treasure it. It’s not the cost of the ring, it’s what the ring means.
jltjake Says:
11 June 2010 at 1:31 am.
would you like some cheese with your whine??? are yo serious??? you’re ticked because of a ring?? does he love you? can you trust him? is he (or will be) a good father?? that’s what matters. get over yourself. be happy he bought you a ring! you want an upgrade, pay for another ring yourself!
Laura Says:
11 June 2010 at 3:17 pm.
$5000? There’s children dying around the world from hunger and you’re complaining because your husband bought you a $5000 ring? You didn’t want to sound materialistic? You ARE materialistic ! It’s your fault you didn’t tell him you did not like the ring.
‘He’s kind of a cheapskate — he actually thinks he spent a lot of money on it, believe it or not.’
You’re just superficial. Be grateful for the things you have, and that he even bought you a $5000 ring.
You’re the type of person, who makes men think that all women are superficial, materialistic, and shallow. Every single one of these adjectives describe you.
I’d be happy with a $100 ring, it’s the thought that counts and what the ring symbolizes, NOT it’s value.
Would you really like your husband to buy you a 10k or 20k ring? That’s basically BUYING your love… if he put thought into which ring to buy for you, that’s what matters!
I wouldn’t even care about a ring, the fact that he proposed would be enough to make me happy. It could be a ring from a bubble gum machine, a $5 ring or a $100 ring, either way at the end of the day, the fact that he proposed and wants to spend the rest of his life with you shows how much he cares about you. NOT a ring.
C A Says:
13 June 2010 at 4:18 am.
Do you work, chica?
Jennifer Says:
13 June 2010 at 10:34 pm.
Wow my ring cost 100 bucks and I love it! Maybe you should love it because he gave it to you and quit worrying about the price!
ღDre@minG iN ma oWn LiL worLdღ Says:
17 June 2010 at 3:27 am.
Okay honey you need to stop worrying about the price of that ring.If the love is in the relationship you don’t need expensive rings and all that.You’ll be surprised how much my wedding ring cost!! it was only $400 and I have no complain.You got yourself lucky by that $$$ ring.Be happy what you got.
Neo Says:
20 June 2010 at 2:10 pm.
$5000 is very appropriate, your husband is very practical guy
the diamond industry has created a hype of spending too much in diamond rings..
you are starting your marriage life, save money now…
Instead of more on diamond ring, ask for something useful in everyday life you would use…
mollyblue55 Says:
24 June 2010 at 12:36 am.
What’s important is what the ring symbolizes – not it’s monetary value. If the monetary value is that important to you, then yes, you are shallow and are not ready for marriage yet.
Rule of thumb has always been to spend 2 months salary on the engagement ring. I have always felt that there are better things to spend that amount of money on than a piece of jewelry.
Kels_Bells Says:
27 June 2010 at 12:09 pm.
Well the rule of thumb is 2 months salary. How much does he earn a month? I do think 5,000 is a bit crappy if he has a big pay packet
Tink51405 Says:
29 June 2010 at 11:09 pm.
You do sound very ungrateful. The amount spent on a ring should not matter. I can understand if it is not your taste, but to be upset about the amount he spent on it is ridiculous. My ring only cost $500. $5000 on a ring is just outrageous. Consider yourself lucky, 90% of women don’t get half of that spent on their wedding rings. Love isn’t measured by money.
jonnykakez Says:
3 July 2010 at 8:33 am.
take the diamonds out melt it down and redue with the materials, or tell him you lost it and make him get you another one insure the cheap *** ring i cant understand men they are all cheap only not when it comes to themselves your not materialistic why shouldnt you wear what you like everytime you look at it its gonna make you made and frown anyways
Inquisitive girl Says:
4 July 2010 at 1:36 pm.
Your post just made me feel sad 
$5000 is a good amount to pay for a ring without being over the top big and tacky…it actually shows class believe it or not….
A 20k ring…seriously..tacky…
No Shortage Says:
6 July 2010 at 10:44 pm.
My advice is to be thankful for the ring you have and treasure it because he picked it out for you. As your 10th anniversary nears, tell him you want an upgrade. As an alternative to a new ring, you could add a 10th anniversary band to the ring you have. It can have diamonds in it as well and be made to fit your existing ring. Just an idea. In any case, a first baby is not the proper occasion for that. Instead, get a ring with your baby’s birthstone in it. While you are waiting for your first baby and your upgraded ring, try to look on the bright side: You are married to a man who loves you and provides for you. Your life could be a lot worse, princess.
Shiloh Says:
7 July 2010 at 3:53 am.
Your wedding ring is supposed to be a symbol of your love. Nothing more. It’s not a status symbol and it’s not a fashion statement.
You don’t just sound superficial, you clearly are. When you have your first baby are you going to demand everyone buy $300 outfits for the baby to spit up on??
Your husband should take your ring back and get you one from a bubble gum machine.
Shanna D Says:
10 July 2010 at 2:21 pm.
Well, I will agree with you that you should have something you like, because you do wear it everyday.
However, I am sure it’s not unreasonable to find something you like for under $5000. It shouldn’t matter that he CAN afford it. A piece of jewelery is not a car, some people find it unreasonable to spend thousands of dollars on what is essentially a pebble. You married the man, not the ring, so stop sweating the unimportant things, like the price tag on your jewelry. It’s fine to tell him you would prefer a different style or setting or what have you, but I think you are being unreasonable in wanting him to spend more.
Vanessa Says:
13 July 2010 at 7:32 pm.
Awwww you poor, poor pitiful thing! You sound spoiled and ungrateful
Eugene Says:
14 July 2010 at 3:51 pm.
5K is a lot of money for a ring. I only spent 2.5K for my wife’s ring and she was very grateful for what it represented and never asked me how much I spent. Just the fact that I had asked her to marry me was enough for her. She also told me that she did not deserve such a nice ring. I guess some guys are just lucky.
Oh, by the way I did upgrade the ring on our 10th anniversary and it was my decision to do it. Actually she was not in agreement and thought it cost too much to put that big of a rock on her ring.
B Says:
16 July 2010 at 6:11 am.
You say you don’t want your husband to think you are materialistic, but you are. Your entire post is about a ring! Not once do you even mention loving this man, you just berate his choice of jewelry, and call him a cheapskate. A good man is worth a million times more than any stone. Be grateful for what you have instead of whining because he didn’t spend a fortune on your ring.
hot lips Says:
18 July 2010 at 2:52 am.
I wish I had $5000 to help my family to pay for my grandma’s stay in the hospital. She suffered a stroke and has pneumonia and it’s costing a lot of money. But we’re pulling together as a family. There’s far more important stuff in life to worry about. Don’t be ungrateful, My fiance got me one that costs $700 and I love it cause it’s the love that counts and not the price of it. I wear it everyday with pride.
Sue C Says:
18 July 2010 at 12:27 pm.
Too late now, but if you didn’t really like the ring in the first place, you should have spoken up & told him it really wasn’t your style. You’ve certainly told him now just what you want in the future, now he’s actually going to loose money on it when/if he trades it in for another one. And, actually asking him how much he paid for it in the first place was a bit going overboard too. Personally I wouldn’t have had the nerve to even ask such a question! I would be grateful he took the time to go pick it out in the first place…good luck in getting your ring…:)
pete 40 Says:
20 July 2010 at 6:41 pm.
i answered this before so i say it again. if you think the ring isn’t good enough then take if off. and leave. i bet if he gives it to someone else you’ll think more of it then.
banky Says:
22 July 2010 at 2:39 pm.
your ring cost more than my car. get a grip. you sound spoiled. if you bitched about the ring i got you i would take it from you and never give it back and never buy you another one. he really didnt have to spend any money on you remember that before you throw your tantrum.
SWEET MILDRED Says:
23 July 2010 at 10:56 pm.
I would post 29 versions of the question monthly.